Many a critic have described the current BGFC as playing like a "a bunch of old women" but Harry has done his homework and spent hours pouring over video's of the BBC's "Born Kicking" (about Roxy, the first female striker who bonks her way into QPR's 1st team), Channel 4's "Manageress" starring Cheri Lunghi as Gabreilla Benson who became the very first woman soccer boss (yes even before Tommy Doc and Howard Wilkinson!) and not forgetting "Gregory's Girl", the 1980 Scottish Blockbuster starring delicious Dee Hepburn and John Gordon Sinclair (pictured above) about a wee lassie who prefers kicking lumps oot of lads rather than 90minutes in the sack with them!

 

Harry is now apparently close to realising his dream of having a BG Womens team (in more ways than one)

 

So who would Harry pick and how would he keep his ladies under control? what about training them and making sure they don't have too many Castaway's (early alcopop from the 1990's) before matches? We asked a well-known football expert to pick his dream BG Ladies Five-a-side.

 

1- Joan

2- Anna Hehir (Barmaid)

3- Anne Clark (Married to Telephone Tim)

4- Tracy (Dimples)

5- Sharon (Legs)

 

Subs: Marie and Lynne.

 

THE VERDICT: Many goalies are Scottish, Crazy or both! So Joan would be our keeper! In defence, we have a combination of aggression in Anna (try asking her for a drink one minute after closing and she bites yer head off!) and Anne Clark provides the elegance, we have to say nice things about her now because she has threatened us with so many solicitors letters.

 

And up front, what a pair of strikers to draw the crowds in! Dimples and Sharon, bags and bags of scoring potential, according to the filthy old dirty men in Zoo Corner!!!

 

Subs, well a controversial pairing here of Marie and Lynne and we are confident that Harry would keep them both warm until their big chance came!